It just won't die, will it, this 'Kismet' nonsense? It's all the fault of the buttoned-up Victorians, of course, who got themselves in a lather at the thought of men exchanging kisses or embraces. It wasn't at all unusual or considered unmanly in the eighteenth century; nor were tears. Jervis embraced Nelson after his success at the battle of Cape St Vincent, and Nelson and other officers - tough as old boots, most of them - frequently recorded that they were in tears at times of high emotion.
The Victorian obsession about homosexuality clearly made the 'Kiss me, Hardy' story highly embarrassing in a repressed and repressive age. But no one at the time who witnessed Nelson's death considered it at all odd, nor thought to suppress the story or invent this ridiculous variation. The mysterious Orient was highly fascinating to Victorian writers and travellers and it was then that the word 'Kismet' (from the Turkish, via the Persian 'quismat',) entered the language. There is not one recorded usage of the word 'kismet' in English before 1849. Source: Shorter English Dictionary.
I know 'Kiss me Hardy' is always good for a snigger; but really, it is a very affecting story of the final farewell of two men who had shared dangers and hardship unimaginable to those who were not there. Remember, too, that Nelson was paralysed so would have had no sensation below his shoulders, would not have been able to shake hands, or make any other human contact in these final hours. Nelson's friendships were important to him, and his friendship with Hardy, rooted as it was in trust, admiration, respect and the intense shared experiences of long, devoted service and furious battle, was one of the most important of all. Think of that, of Nelson's request, and Hardy's response: isn't 'Kiss me, Hardy' a most fitting and touching ending to a deep friendship and an heroic life?
_________________ Anna
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