(Forgive me if this has already been posted here at some time.) Satirist Joseph Moser imagines the defeat of Napoleon's naval invasion force. (OCR errors mostly fixed)
From Spirit of the Public Journals, Vol. VIII (1804):
THE LONDON GAZETTE EXTRAORDINARY. PUBLISHED BY ANTICIPATION*. [from: Asperne's Collection of Loyal Papers]
*This ingenious piece is said to have been a hasty production from the pen of a worthy and active Magistrate, Joseph Moser, Esq. to whom the public stand indebted for numerous Essays, Lucubrations, and Vestiges, abounding in wit and humour, no less than in interest and utility. His lighter labours, for several years past, seem to have been chiefly devoted to the European Magazine.
Admiralty Office, November 8, 1803. THIS morning, at half past four o'clock, Captain Briton, of his Majesty's ship the Invincible, arrived at this office with dispatches from the Right Honourable Lord Guard'em, Admiral of the Blue, and Commander in Chief of the Channel Fleet, to the Right Honourable Lord Finisterre, of which the following are copies:
Royal Sovereign, St. Helens, Nov. 7, 1803. My Lord, I have the honour, by this, the earliest opportunity, to inform your Lordship, that on Thursday the 3d instant, Captain Lynx, of the Eagle frigate, communicated to me a letter from Lieutenant Piercer, of the hired armed cutter L'Espion, stationed to watch the operations of the French off Brest, &c. stating, that from the motions of their gun-boats, fishing vessels, and other small fry, which had, for some time, both singly and (as opportunity offered) in fleets, been skulking along the coast, from their small ports and inlets, to avoid our cruisers ; nay, this letter adds, that some of them have even been put upon wheels, and drawn to their place of grand rendezvous by horses, therefore there was reason to believe that the long-expected expedition was on the point of sailing. These movements, and also some which were made by the men of war in the harbour, which I had intelligence were no longer chained to the ground, induced me also to suspect that the enemy meant to take advantage of the length and darkness of the nights, and of the fogs, which, even at this early period of the winter, hang over the Channel in the day, and attempt, with their collected force, the invasion of our coast. This suspicion was in some degree confirmed by advices which I received from Captain Oak, of the Fury bomb, Lieutenant Sting, of the Ant cutter, and from other quarters, all agreeing that similar operations were carrying on at St. Maloes, aml other ports, which led me to conclude that the different flotillas acted in concert, and that the hustle in every place indicated a general movement at the same time. Fearful that the appearance of an English vessel should thwart their intention, and two or three gathered together frighten them back to their ports; and resolved, at the fame time, to give them plenty of sea-room; I ordered all the brigs, cutters, sloops, luggers, launches, and even skiffs, with which we had hitherto opposed them, to join the fleet, which I judged to be the only means to put an end to the vapouring on their parts, which every gale had conveyed to our shores, and impatience on ours at the delay of vengeance which the brave fellows under my command seemed to consider as the only hardships of the expedition.
As I expected, on Friday morning the 4th instant, the signal was made from the Resolute, Captain Takeall, that the enemy had failed, and were at that time about eighty leagues S. E. of Cape Barfleur, collecting their force, which was stated to consist of twenty-eight ships of the line and some frigates. The small craft, which issued from the creeks on the opposite side of the Channel, I understood to be innumerable. I immediately ordered the signal to be made for the fleet under my command to make all fail in chase, and endeavour to cut them off their own coast : this we happily effected. Favoured by the wind, we found on the morning of the fifth of November instant, the day on which they had proudly vaunted that they intended to make a descent on our coast, that they were about mid-channel, incumbered with their immense flotillas, which appeared to be scattered in all directions, and which, it seemed, by the frequent signals of the flag-ship, and the anxiety of the repeating frigates, the Admiral was endeavouring to collect, and, as much as in his power, to concentrate. A circumstance happened at this period (nine o'clock, A. M.) which the enemy probably considered as fortunate, though in the event it was attended with serious consequences to them: namely, about half an hour after we had discovered them, and just as I had made the signal for the ships as they advanced to attack them singly, for, against such an irregular and disorderly-like foe, it was impossible to form a regular line of battle ; just at this moment when the True Briton, Captain Steady, who led the van, was within pistol-shot of L'Assassin, Captain Sang, it came on so foggy, that for some time it shrouded the whole fleet from our sight. The enemy, taking advantage of this circumstance, crowded all the sail they could carry, and, as I have since been informed, In their hurry to bear away from us, not only ran foul of each other, but run down many of their flat-bottomed boats and small vessels. About eleven A. M. the fog cleared away, and, as we had still kept on the same tack, we again discovered them: Captain Steady, resolute in his purpose, soon came up with, and attacked L'Assassin, with an alacrity and intrepedity that does honour to himself, officers, and crew: the other ships, as they came up, went gallantly into action, which was continued with uniform success on our part till four o'clock, P. M.
During this contest, L'Egyptien, Admiral Jaffa, a near relation of the First Consul, struck to the Royal Sovereign, on board of which I had hoisted my flag; the Admiral and crew were consequently made prisoners of war. Le Catiline was sunk by a broadside from the Tremendous, Captain Dart. La Gasconade blew up early in the action. Le Brutus struck to the Caesar, Captain Pharsalia. Le Pet** (bomb) also blew up with a terrible explosion, when alongside Le Regicide, which, from this circumstance, caught fire and burnt to the water's edge. Never was acclamation so general as that from our surrounding ships when Le Catiline went down. This I mention with the more fatisfaction, as the greater part of her crew were saved by the gallantry of the British seamen.
The contest betwixt the Lion and Le Coq, both first rates, was, while it lasted, extremely severe; but it was decided in favour of the former. While the capture of the latter seems to have been the signal for a general retreat on the part of the enemy, who immediately after appear to have foregone the intention of invading our island, and, in consequence, taking advantage of a gale which sprung up in their favour, to have borne away for their own coast. Le Marat, Le Santerre, L'Egalite, La Bastille, which they intended for a prison-ship, with several others, flew, to escape our fleet, with all the canvass they could crowd. In this, however, they had little success. Le Marat was forced into action by the Terrible, Captain Conde, and soon after struck. Of the others I have not yet received a correct account; but have reason to believe that several were either burnt, sunk,or taken; and that those few which hid the good fortune to escape, were in so crippled a state as to prevent the French government from a second attempt at invasion, for at least many years. Thus ended this glorious and memorable day, in the course of which, and in attending to its consequences, your Lordship will perceive that I have been too much engaged to be more particular. One observation you will permit me to make with respect to the officers and sailors under my command - that they have upon this, as upon former occasions, acted like true Britons. Where all have been so meritorious, it would appear invidious to mention particular individuals; but it is with pleasure and pride I boast that they have in every respect deserved the rewards, the applauses, the honours, which their King and Country, whom they have so ably defended and avenged, have prepared for them.
I have the honour to be, with the greatest respect, my Lord, your Lordship's most obedient humble servant,
GUARD'EM.
[** "the Fart"]
_________________ My mind . . . is like a bow for ever bent.
- Collingwood
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